What is Happiness? Should We Really Be Pursuing It?

Happiness is such an elusive and complicated concept. Sometimes we have it and sometimes we don’t. But what is happiness really?

According to Merriam-Webster, happiness is defined as “a state of well being and contentment.” I think the key word in that definition is state. It’s impermanent and ever slipping through our finger tips. I know that the declaration of independence cites the “the pursuit of happiness” as one of our core rights but is it really a right? Is happiness worth pursuing all of the time? Let’s do something I often suggest to my clients. Let’s run a pros and cons list:

Pros of pursuing happiness:

1. It gives us something to strive for 
2. If/when we reach happiness, it feels good

Cons to pursuing happiness:

1. We can always be striving for something and therefore become less present in the process
2. We can fall into the “I’ll be happy when _____” trap
3. Happiness is fleeting so we’re striving for something we can’t permanently have which may be disappointing

In my opinion – and this is my opinion – I believe that pursuing happiness is a losing game due to the cons above. What I do think is a worthy feat is seeking to have peace and serenity in one’s life. 

What does that mean to me?

Having peace and serenity means that you are calm, untroubled, and accepting of your life and yourself exactly how it is. This, to me, is worth pursuing because it’s not a fleeting state. It’s a trait. Pursuing happiness, to me, inherently means that you’re unhappy with your current life state. After all, why would you want to be happier? Pursuing serenity and peace means that you’re deepening your understanding/acceptance of yourself and the world around you.

It’s up to you whether you want happiness and/or serenity/peace. I’m not here to tell you what to do or who to be. Wishing you well on your healing journey 🤗.

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